Good-by 2009 and Good Riddance, you will not be missed....

Now that 2009 is coming to a close I look back and it isn't a year I will miss. I've lived over 50 years and know that you have good years, not so good years, and bad years. Well, 2009 was a bad one for me. Most will think it's because of the cancer, that was one thing, but not all. I had a job that I hated every day I went to it and I finally lost it in July, a blessing & a curse. There hasn't been a good prospect for a new one at all in 2009. It was a year that I tried to get VA benefits and was told NO, I wasn't in the right sub group to get ANY help! If I was just a minority it would be easy. Because of the M/M I had to stop giving platelets to the blood bank. That was something I have done all my adult life and it gave me a lot of joy. It was a year that I had to deal with back pain for the first time. It was a year of medical tests, the likes of which I have never had to do before, and on and on...

The Multiple Myeloma has been a roller coaster ride. Since being diagnosed on October 14th it has gone from MGUS, to stage 1 and now maybe back to MGUS or smoldering Stage 1. Who knows... I just had my bone marrow biopsy and that should give me some answers. I'm hoping for a change in how the doctors talk about it. I want it to go from I think.... to it is... A small change but a good one for how I deal with it.

I had my first trip in an ambulance since becoming an adult last week. Tried to lift my granddaughter Allyson and felt a very sharp pain in my lower back. By the morning I wasn't able to move and didn't want anybody touching me. Long story short, not M/M related so the Dr. gave me some IV pain meds and then some Norco to take home and it is a lot better now. I've never had back pain like that before so that wasn't fun! I'm hoping it is a one time thing. However I have a plan if it happens again so I won't have to freak out and call an ambulance for help!

Sounds like I'm kinda depressed but I'm not. Like all years it wasn't all bad. I have a new grandson Nathan. He came in the world healthy and happy. That was a blessing. My family is mostly healthy, except for Allyson in the hospital from time to time for breathing stuff.

I'm really looking forward to 2010. 2010 has some very good prospects. I see my UCSF oncologist on January 8th. He will have the results of the bone marrow biopsy and a plan for treatment. It might be just doing blood tests every 3 month for ??? or if it is more than that at least I will know. I really like having a plan and being able to work that plan. While giving my biopsy marrow I was able to donate some marrow to the Multiple Myeloma Consortium for research... That kinda replaced losing the ability to give platelets at the blood bank, I feel good about that. All my children, grandchildren are doing fine and we are looking forward to watching Nathan do all the first year things, smiling, rolling over, sitting up and maybe his first steps. I'm hopeful that I can find a job and be a productive member of the work force. Jenni and I have been brought closer by the challenges and that's good. Even in the worse years I can always count on her being there for me, thank you & love you sweetheart... That is a good way to start 2010!

So... let 2009 be gone and good riddance...let 2010 get here and let it be one of the good years. God willing..

The body is sick, but thanks to Jesus the soul is alive and well...

Steven