And the wait goes on...with guilt

Not much happening on the M/M front. I went to Dr. Martin at UCSF. He said I still might me MGUS or low level one M/M. He said it looked like I was walking the line between the two. He scheduled me for a Bone Marrow Biopsy on Monday December 28th. Then we will know. He said it will take 2 weeks to get the full results. Doctor Martin gave me the option of getting it done at UCSF or local. If I get it done at UCSF I can donate some marrow to the Multiple Myeloma Foundation for study. I figured if I had to have it done I might as well help out the research, plus Jenni and I will go early and make a day of it on Sunday.

I'm really not looking forward to the biopsy. A big needle pushed into a hip bone and then stuff pulled out. They will numb my hip but no way to numb the bone marrow! They say it really hurts when they remove it, but it is fast, they say!!! Anyway; you know me... Tough as nails practically indestructible!!! I'll live, and it is a small thing compared to what my friends are living with.

I read a blog of another M/M patient. He is in remission but might be starting to see some traces of the cancer again. He said, at times, he feels guilty for getting good news and doing so well when others are fighting so hard. I can really relate to that feeling. Getting the diagnosis of full M/M and then maybe back to MGUS...well I was thrilled but at the same time felt guilty for being so happy when some new friends are so sick. Crazy how this stuff works.

So I will keep smiling and be positive. Nothing we can do to speed up the test results, and it will be what it will be. Pulling for MGUS, even with the guilt... For those on the prayer list... pray for 10% plasma cells or less!!! I'll blog/Facebook the results when I know.