We are all given things in life that we have no control of. We are male or female, white, black, Hispanic etc., we are short or tall, we are good looking or not, you get the drift. We also have things in life that happen to us that we have no control of, like injuries or sickness. We can do nothing about these so we have to just accept them and go on.
My body is sick... I have MM and at this point there is little that I can do to change that. The sickness is a daily part of my life. I get up and I have to take my pills. If I don't then my feet and legs are a mess. So, I get up and I go get my pills and start my day.
My Dr. told me that healthy people live longer. What he explained was I needed to get fit and lose the excess weight. It will do as much, if not more, than the treatments that I will have to do in the future. On my last ride, I realized what he was talking about was being strong. I can't help being sick but strong was up to me! It is a choice I have to make each and every day. To be as strong as I can, mentally, physically and spiritually. Sick or not we all have this choice each and every day. The the decision to be strong.
I know that as the cancer grows and things change that I will have to change also. I might not be able to bike ride. I might do well to just keep up some light exercise. I've come to realize that being strong doesn't mean you are the best at what you do. It just means you are the best at what you can do "NOW"!
It is easy to just throw up your arms and let the situation take over. It is harder to say, each day, that I will give the day all I have. At this point "all I have" is a lot. The cancer hasn't made my life that much different. Yes, I have peripheral neuropathy from it but it is well controlled. I'm riding 35 to 45 miles at a time 3 to 4 times a week and I'm averaging 16-17 mph doing it! I haven't been in this good of shape or this strong since leaving the Marine Corps! I've lost over 20lbs and I only have 10 more to go! I feel strong and it feels good!
My son and wife can attest that I don't have a competitive bone in my body. When I play softball, card games, board games etc. as long as everyone is having fun them I'm OK with that. I do strive to be the best I can be when it comes to a task I have in front of me. That spirit is what I tap into when I'm working on being strong. I push myself hard and in the end it is worth it.
So I will continue to push and be strong. It won't stop me from being sick but I'm NOT letting this cancer define who I am. I will live my life until it is over. I will count the miles and the pounds and stay as strong as I can. I will choose each and every day to be strong, cancer or not!
The body is sick, but thanks to Jesus the soul is alive and well...
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8 years ago
Great post babe, you have always been strong in what you believe in, a great trait!
ReplyDeleteAMEN!!!! This is Tim's outlook too. Most folks
ReplyDeletehave now forgotten that he even has cancer. He
has never let it define who he is and does not act like he's sick at all.He says he's just gonna keep on working and living his life like
he did before. He stops every so often, gets poked and prodded at the doc's, and then goes back about his business. Keep on truckin' Steven. You're doing a heckuva job!
"The body is sick, but thanks to Jesus the soul is alive and well..." I have loved this closing since I started reading your blog. I am sending you such healing thoughts Steven. Peripheral neuropathy sucks though; I think I could do ok if I could just stand the neuropathy.
ReplyDeleteKeep up your attitude.
Rebecca Weber