The life your given vs. the life you make or to be sick or strong.

We are all given things in life that we have no control of. We are male or female, white, black, Hispanic etc., we are short or tall, we are good looking or not, you get the drift. We also have things in life that happen to us that we have no control of, like injuries or sickness. We can do nothing about these so we have to just accept them and go on.

My body is sick... I have MM and at this point there is little that I can do to change that. The sickness is a daily part of my life. I get up and I have to take my pills. If I don't then my feet and legs are a mess. So, I get up and I go get my pills and start my day.

My Dr. told me that healthy people live longer. What he explained was I needed to get fit and lose the excess weight. It will do as much, if not more, than the treatments that I will have to do in the future. On my last ride, I realized what he was talking about was being strong. I can't help being sick but strong was up to me! It is a choice I have to make each and every day. To be as strong as I can, mentally, physically and spiritually. Sick or not we all have this choice each and every day. The the decision to be strong.

I know that as the cancer grows and things change that I will have to change also. I might not be able to bike ride. I might do well to just keep up some light exercise. I've come to realize that being strong doesn't mean you are the best at what you do. It just means you are the best at what you can do "NOW"!

It is easy to just throw up your arms and let the situation take over. It is harder to say, each day, that I will give the day all I have. At this point "all I have" is a lot. The cancer hasn't made my life that much different. Yes, I have peripheral neuropathy from it but it is well controlled. I'm riding 35 to 45 miles at a time 3 to 4 times a week and I'm averaging 16-17 mph doing it! I haven't been in this good of shape or this strong since leaving the Marine Corps! I've lost over 20lbs and I only have 10 more to go! I feel strong and it feels good!

My son and wife can attest that I don't have a competitive bone in my body. When I play softball, card games, board games etc. as long as everyone is having fun them I'm OK with that. I do strive to be the best I can be when it comes to a task I have in front of me. That spirit is what I tap into when I'm working on being strong. I push myself hard and in the end it is worth it.

So I will continue to push and be strong. It won't stop me from being sick but I'm NOT letting this cancer define who I am. I will live my life until it is over. I will count the miles and the pounds and stay as strong as I can. I will choose each and every day to be strong, cancer or not!

The body is sick, but thanks to Jesus the soul is alive and well...

It's done

The Giant's 5k is done. We spent the weekend in San Francisco and we all finished the run/walk. We had 3 walkers, Jenni (my wife), Jan (my niece), and me. A family friend Crystal ran the 5k. I hurt my left calf many years ago and it stops me from doing longer runs. That isn't a problem as I really love riding my bike a lot more.

Although we had a great time with the Giants run I'm not thrilled with San Francisco. I'm a country boy and a lot of the stuff in the city I just don't get. The bad smells, the noise, and the strange people. I also don't get why they tax you for everything. It was $26.00 per night for hotel tax alone! There is a health tax on food above and beyond the normal state taxes. Parking cost $45.00 per night and even that is taxed! I told Jenni we won't be spending any more time in San Francisco. When I go to UCSF we will stay out of the city and drive in.

It also isn't kid friendly. We had strollers and walked back and forth between the hotel and Giants baseball park. Every time we took our life and the lives of our grand children in our own hands! Every time we walked with the strollers we had people turn their car in front of us while we had the right of way. I guess the 5 to 10 seconds they saved waiting for us to cross made a big difference in their life! It was crazy....

It is also not kid friendly as you don't know what your going to see. We are walking back to the hotel from lunch and a group of naked men were riding their bikes down the street! Yes, you read that right...NAKED MEN! In Redding they would get arrested and would be thrown in jail for public nudity. Nobody seemed to care in San Francisco. Now, I should have expected that as in the application for the run there was a caution not to do it naked. I have done a lot of formal bike rides locally and I have never been cautioned to not ride naked! Luckily we were able to distract most of the kids but one of our young girls make the comment "I saw his bottom"! Not good; as all the kids were under 7!

In the future I'll keep these activities in smaller towns in my area. At least I can avoid most of the crazy stuff.

We raised $590.00. Not a lot but I guess it all helps.

The body is sick, but thanks to Jesus the soul is alive and well...

Life just moves on...

I haven't blogged lately, mostly because nothing new is happening here in California. My neuropathy is under control and I'm able to ride my bike and carry on with my life. I missed a dose last Friday morning because I was watching my grandchildren (3 of them) and by the afternoon it was ugly. Jenni says that she is now in control of making sure I take my pills. I guess these pills really do make a difference!

My bike riding is going well. I comfortably do 25 miles with an ave. speed of over 15 mph. I'm happy with that distance and ave. speed. I'll never go "pro" but it will keep me in shape and that's what it is all about.

My weight is slowly going down. I only have 10 lbs. to get to where my oncologist wants me to be. I have until July 15th to get there. I'm sure I can do it. I'm already down 17 lbs. and the plan continues...

I stopped taking my high blood pressure medication this morning! I've had to manage it very carefully when riding my bike. It was dropping to very low levels and I was getting weak and dizzy after my rides. The last week the weakness and dizziness was happening W/O a bike ride. I started tracking my blood pressure and it is staying in the 120/60 range all the time, even W/O the medication. I don't think any Dr. would be concerned with that range! So I'll stop taking it and just continue tracking it every few days. If it goes back up...then I'll start taking my pills again! Managing this doesn't take a rocket scientist so I feel OK doing it on my own. The exercise and weight loss is doing it's job!

Our run for MMRF is in less than 2 weeks in San Francisco. We didn't collect very much money (about $500) but I'm sure everything helps. I have 4 team members doing the run. I also have my son doing the 1/2 marathon. It includes a A's vs Giants baseball game so we should all have a very good time.

That's about all I have to go over. I feel great and I'm praying that my July MM #'s are down. I'm giving it all I have...


The body is sick, but thanks to Jesus the soul is alive and well...